On an email list I’m on, we were discussing Black Friday. One of our members, Simone from “down under” asked what Black Friday is. So for the benefit of anyone reading this from outside the United States, here’s a take on Black Friday. I’m sure you can look up other definitions, and some may be more accurate, but possibly not as entertaining.
The fourth Thursday in the United States is Thanksgiving. A day when we get together in hearth and home with those we love most and give thanks for the things for which we are most grateful. Or, as Christina referred to it in her blog …. FDAD – family dysfunction awareness day. Actually it’s a day when we all get together, eat as much as possible, and drink til we forget we were supposed to count all those calories.
The single most popular “dish of the day” is turkey — which makes it rather odd when we say “Happy Turkey Day” because the poor turkey is the LEAST happy of everyone at the table
(actually s/he’s dead so doesn’t really care now).
Since most people are doped out on tryptophan (an amino acid in turkey – generally blamed for people’s tendency to sleep after partaking ofsaid bird – nobody seems to blame that fact that we’ve not only had turkey but also wine, potatoes, wine, stuffing, wine, cranberry sauce, and did I mention the wine) the day after Thanksgiving is a holiday for everyone in the country EXCEPT the retailers.
For some reason, the end of Thanksgiving was traditionally considered the start of the Christmas season in the states (of course, now the Christmas season starts around Labor Day — first weekend in September – at least that’s about the time the decorations start selling in the stores — I mean I understand having the Christmas CRAFTS in the stores in September, you need to get them that early in order to put them on a shelf to “do later,” “later” of course being a few years from now because everyone knows that anything you make out of fabric that you’ve owned more than 6 months is FREE). So, since everyone had the day off it was deemed a great time to start Christmas shopping. Because everyone is going out shopping, retailers tend to have sales to attract all those shoppers to THEIR stores, and since everyone is having sales, people are going shopping, so the retailers are having sales to attract the shoppers and the shoppers are going out because of the sales. (Which came first, the chicken or the egg?) (NOW do you understand why this blog is called “ramblingmom”?)
But basically since mom pretty much cooked ALL DAY the day before (and the day before that and the day before that and the day before that because in order to give our thanks, we must eat everything in site),and since dad has the day off work (and spent the entire time mom was cooking sitting on his arse watching football — “soccer” for those of you in the civilized world), mom bugs out of the house early on the day after Thanksgiving and dad (who is hungover from all that wine) gets to wake up when the kids start screaming for breakfast and dad is surprised to find mom gone. So mom goes out for some
retail therapy Christmas shopping (one for you and one for me andone for you and one for me).
Actually – she’s sitting at the brunch place having mimosa’s with her girlfriends.