When life hands you lemons — get some tequila and salt and give me a call.
Last week was — let’s say — interesting.
That day, I was watching niece#4 and nephew#1 while Chip and Princess were at school. After Chip and Princess came home, I took all four kids over to Grandma’s for an annual Chinese Feast that she makes. (I believe it has something to do with the Ghost Festival), in which a bunch of food is made to honor the ancestors, and then we all get to eat it. And honey, if Grandma is cooking Chinese I am THERE!!! So I take all the kidlets over to Gmas, about the time the first storm came through. We were actually enjoying watching the show that the b1tch was putting on. I then dropped the kids off and left to attempt to run some errands. I tried to go into my office to do some stuff, but when I got there I discovered that the power was out, so I did the only natural thing and took off for Ikea. I headed home to take care of the dog and drop some stuff off and went to turn on the TV (maybe to watch the weather channel). I discovered that the TV was out. Absolutely no reaction to my trying to turn it on. At that time, I didn’t realize that this was the beginning of a number of discoveries to be made over the next few days. Shortly thereafter Spouse came home and somehow we discovered that in addition to the TV, a VCR was also shot. We were starting to wonder if enough damage was done to meet the $500 deductible on our insurance (HA I say, again I say HA)
So Spouse and I head back to Gmas (about a 10 minute drive) in one car as storm # 4 was coming through the area. So we have the feast, and I start sending text messages to Crem. I knew that he had a TV that, at that time, he was using as a rather heavy (and rather expensive) paperweight. Knowing my children’s need to play videogames, and knowing Spouse’s need to watch the
idiotic O’Reilly Factor, and knowing MY need to avoid a power struggle on those two parts I start asking to borrow the paperweight. He, of course, was not (at the time) interested in my troubles, as he was stuck on a train, since there was a powerline down on the railroad tracks. This situation (for some reason) made the engineers not wish to take the train on the track with said power line (did I mention that Mother Nature is now being called the b1tch). I offer to go fetch him from the train and get him to his car so he doesn’t have to wait for an unknown amount of time to get home. I go and say to Spouse “I need to go fetch Crem, do you want me to take you and the kids home and then go get him, OR do you want me to get him to his car and come back and get you guys” when Spouse comes up with the brilliant idea to get Crem and bring him back to Gma’s first (which was somewhat logical considering geography and timing). Gma, upon finding out this turn of events offers to give Crem some leftovers. I send a text “I’m on my way, and have I got a deal for you, don’t eat anything.” So I manage to get Crem, just as an announcement comes that the trains will be starting again — oh well.
Now, Gma likes to COOK, and as a person who likes to COOK, what she really likes is to see people EAT. She often thinks that us westerners won’t like her cooking. I do believe she was not unhappy when Crem went back. For THIRDS!!! Everyone got some lemonade out of those lemons (I eventually got a “loan” of the large paperweight — but we’re not yet sure how long the “loan” will be for — come to think of it – the last time I remember Crem actually wanting to watch something on TV, it was the last winter olympics he wanted to see the curling as one of his sibling’s friends is on the Canadian Women’s curling team. )
Eventually Spouse, kids, and I head home, and SIL and BIL take Crem to his car (which made sense, geographically speaking). I’m sure somewhere around this time we find out that the air conditioning is broken.
More to come …