Happy virtual holidays

PRESENTS

I got (virtual) PRESENTS.

To crazywritinfool

a handyman that knows as much as this guy (KK — JohnO says the picture didn’t work for him — it works for me but in case you can’t see it, it’s a picture of Al Borlund, a/k/a the REAL “Tool man”).

To johno (and chriso) that the electric company forgets to send the December bill.

To terann that it’s TRUE and it really is all done and there are no Christmas preparations that you’ve completely forgotten (that and reliable coleaders)

To The Nita a laptop that totally works all the time.

To elizbear, clean sidewalks (so you don’t have to wrangle the kids out to take dad to the train station).

To willowgreen, that your haiku muse keeps it up — I’ve loving this.

To msmemory, more reasons to wear the LBD without the CEO.

To lecil, one of them there job thingies, so that you can afford to go visit your parent’s vacation home (need a travel companion??  Oh I know PICK ME PICK ME).

To calvin, lots of boat trips with the boys.

To kt, HEALTHY kids, and the continued support of mamasara (and Chef Bob).

To mike, clear roads to work for the scooter and considerably less travel (but if your route should bring you to the windy city – call me.

To bunny, that there are no outvasions. And that the neighbor with the lawn obsession decides to move.

To squib, I’m thinking you need to go to that foot/tea place after the toy drive. And the funds and freedom to get to the other coast next October.

To mll, that the job thing (for both of you) works out, and that YOU get to get to the other coast next October.

To Doc Thelma, that just once you can have an entire semester without students with an overblown sense of entitlement, and that YOU get to get to the other coast next October.

To suzthorn, that “this too shall pass” and it all clears up, and that YOU get to get to the other coast next October.

To Sock Girl, if you decide to lose any more days, lose stinky awful days at work, and not fun days with your kiddies. Just saying. Oh yeah, and I’d love it if life could manage to get you a trip to the west coast of the US say, next October.

To Simone, that the next time you have a girl’s weekend, it be “up over” (isn’t that the opposite of “down under”). Anyways, win that money and come visit us. I’m thinking the west coast in October.

To LSM, safe travels in the right direction (or maybe either Adventure Guy traveling with you OR one of them GPS things). And that you find your way to the west coast in October.

To Alto2, that if you’re going to take any wild life roller coaster rides next year, with high high and low lows, at least you not be whipped around all over the place in the same friggin week. I’m just sayin’. I’m thinking you deserve a deadly dull BORING 2008. (Except in October — when I’d love it if you could make it to the west coast)

To mimi, I’m really wanting some boring for you — especially in the step kid department. OH and more video from the bio kids. Too cute. Oh yeah — and maybe hit the other end of the country in October.

To Mom of 4K I’m thinking of the tune

Baubles, bangles, hear how they jing, jinga-linga
Baubles, bangles, bright shiny beads
Sparkles, spangles, your heart will sing, singa-linga
Wearin’ baubles, bangles and beads

And time to spend shopping for them (and not worrying about how to pay for them or ship them home). (hmmm I wonder if there are any button shops on the west coast?? maybe you should check that out??? say around oh October).

To my friend in Torrey Pines, a three sided coin, and maybe even a December trip to Orlando. (That would be AFTER the October trip to somewhere on YOUR coast)

And for the people that I know read this that don’t have blogs.

CADB – like lecil, one of those job things (for both you and Mr. B.) and that your children bicker less than mine do.

and finally, to my bestest friend, Crem, that for the next year (okay I’m sure you’ll settle for a month, or a week, or a day) that if you have to put up with people acting like 11 or 9 or 7 or 6 year olds, that they are your actual “pseudo” nieces and nephew and NOT your coworkers (that are supposed to be acting like adults). (And that your friends stop treating you like their own personal — see the guy in the picture above).

This is just fundamentally WRONG

Everyone knows (though again I’m not finding a reference) that in Chicago there are two seasons

1. Winter and
2. Road construction

One of the main advantages of winter is the lack of road construction, and one of the main advantages of road construction is the lack of winter.

Somebody forgot the carnal rule AND NEVER THE TWAIN SHALL MEET.

I can take road construction, and I can take winter, but both together … it’s just plain WRONG – WRONG WRONG WRONG.

Or, as I was saying to Spouse last night “I thought the orange cones were supposed to fly south for the winter, WTF do they think they are??  Canadian Geese??  Orange cones are supposed to be a MIGRATORY species“

Alto2, Mimi, Mom of 4K, PLEASE come take them away and bring them where all the other Illinois snow birds go?  (Yeah, there’s a reason we send all our blue hairs down to you guys when the weather gets bad too).

Today’s lesson — assume the best

There’s an old quote (which, of course, I can’t find a reference for) that is something to the effect that

It’s bad etiquette to use the wrong fork, but even worse etiquette to point out that someone else is using the fork incorrectly.

In other words, yeah it’s not all that great to do the wrong thing inadvertently, but it’s even worse to lord it over people when others are doing something wrong.

In other other words, which fork one uses isn’t really as important (in the long run) as treating people with respect and gentleness.

I think of this now, at this time, when everyone is at their wit’s end. Everyone is over harried, overworked, overstressed, and overwhelmed. Sometimes we make mistakes (I know I do). You might get the wrong present for someone (or the right present for the wrong person), or you may go to a friend’s for dinner and they might put the claret in the brandy glass or some other major social faux pas (well, they can do that any time of year) or serve dessert with the soup spoons.

I tend to sometimes not very successfully try to cut people some slack.  Not only is it the polite thing to do, it keeps your blood pressure low.